My Constant Companion

I have a friend like no other friend I've had. I have never seen him, but I love Him with all my heart! I could not live without him. He stays close by my side. In fact, I can call him my constant companion. He is the Holy Ghost; a member of the Godhead. I am in awe of this realization. To have the member of the God Head as my constant companion gives me the assurance that I have infinite worth. I am a daughter of a Living God. I love the Holy Ghost!

He became my companion when I turned 8 years old and was baptized and confirmed a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I remember that day vividly. Not what I wore, but how I felt. I had had my interview with the bishop and passed off the Articles of Faith with confidence and ease. He asked me questions about the gospel that I could readily answer. I felt prepared, even at the tender age of 8. Dad baptized me on Saturday, without incident... I'm sure. I felt so clean and pure. But it was Sunday that I remember so vividly. It was after I was confirmed a member of the church and received the "gift of the Holy Ghost". A warm, peaceful feeling prevailed over me the entire day. I knew I had made the right choice. My desire was to be "perfect" and I was not going to let anything or anyone detract me from my goal. 

After church, our family was gathered in the living room. My brothers and sisters were rowdy and loud; goofing around as usual. Like all kids do, including me! But today was my day! I got out the scriptures and plopped down in the middle of the living room floor and read some verses out of them. I was not about to let the distractions of family life in our house get the best of me. I remember feeling a desire deep within my heart to have the Holy Ghost with me and to feel the love of my Father In Heaven and our Savior. I never wanted this day or these feelings to leave me. 

Life has a way of happening and I wasn't as perfect as I wanted to be. Mistakes were made. Choices could not be taken back. Lessons were learned... mostly the hard way... for many years. Even though I was sealed in the temple to a companion I wanted to last for all eternity; it ended. I had to lean on the Savior and the companionship of the Holy Ghost to help me through... what seemed like endless days and nights of grief, pain, and loneliness. I felt Angels around me, on both sides of the veil, and the steadiness of sandled feet by my side... day after day. My testimony increased as I said my prayers, read my scriptures, and attended my church meetings and the temple. I felt the power of the Holy Ghost and the atonement of the Savior lift me from fear and despair to hope and courage.  

I continued to yearn for heaven and the blessings promised in the temple. I always knew where my heart was and where my desires would lead me. And that would be back home. Home to safety, protection, and peace. 

It wasn't until 2005, when my father passed away, that I can truly say I was born again. Born again of the spirit. And His spirit has not left me to this day. 

When dad passed away I yearned for comfort and peace. I wanted a testimony for myself of the truthfulness of the plan of salvation. I desired a witness... and I received! Not only one answer, but many answers came... from the deepest yearnings of my heart and soul. Even though I had been taught all my days of the plan of salvation and I had always believed, it was at this time that I was able to learn first-hand from the Holy Ghost. 

The Holy Ghost teaches and testifies of truth. He leads us to be humble. He bears witness to the reality of God and His Son, Jesus Christ. The plan of salvation is a perfect! It is marvelous! It is a wonder! It is a loving gift from God. To follow and trust in His plan provides comfort and peace. It allows us to come back into His presence and to live eternally with our families. I have had many wonderful experiences while reading the scriptures, listening to a talk, hearing a testimony, saying a prayer, singing a hymn, participating in a Sunday School or Relief Society lesson, and from Conference talks where the spirit has spoken truth to my soul. I feel it in my entire being. I feel peace and joy. There is not a meeting I go to that I don't feel like the spirit is teaching me something. I may have read it before. I may have heard it before. But the truth is spoken and my understanding is clear and I know what has been said is true! I learn line upon line; precept upon precept. My testimony grows. My faith increases. I am more confident in connecting the truths that intersect with each other, though it may be years apart. I still understand! With every truth I learn, I am more humbled. I am more aware of my imperfections and weaknesses and I desire to be better. I can't even imagine not having the Holy Ghost to teach me. I love Him!

The Holy Ghost comforts and sustains us in affliction and trials. How grateful I am for having His love and companionship at the times of my parents deaths, and my children's deaths. What joy, peace, and healing prevailed my heart and soul knowing that they were welcomed, with loving arms, back home to His presence... because His love is unconditional and all encompassing. Although each loved one's mission on the other side may be different from the other, I have no doubt that they continue in the work in family settings. They are loved and placed where they will learn and grow best. They are given every opportunity to repent and progress. They are put on their designed path that leads to eternal life. That is the way God designed the plan of happiness. I know that I could not bear to lose one child... how can I even begin to comprehend how the Lord feels about each of us, His children. We were created in His image. We are His work and His glory! 

The Holy Ghost provides warning and protection. I have felt the protective powers of angels cushioning my out-of-control car as it careened across two lanes of traffic, hit a mile post marker, spun around, and landed on the railroad tracks at the bottom of an embankment... with no effects from the crash. No injuries; no soreness. Nothing.

Although I didn't know it at the time, shortly before I learned of Greg's unfaithfulness, I felt unseen added strength... a protective power... something I didn't understand. It wasn't until after his excommunication and our family was mortally wounded that I would begin to understand the love that came beyond the veil to protect us from the evil that had come upon our family. I was buoyed up with great faith at that time. How thankful I was for the Holy Ghost!

The Holy Ghost guides us daily. He inspires us. He guides us in the little things as well as the big things. He leads us to do good. It's almost like a nudge, a thought, a whisper, a prompting. After we learned of Shaniel's death and our family was sitting in the funeral director's office making funeral plans, a question came up that involved Scott's family, the Donaldson's. Their only other son was called and the conversation was put on speaker phone. The atmosphere was tense and uneasiness filled the room. I then felt a strong urge with the words "tell him you love them" enter my mind. It was so compelling and so urgent that I could not withhold those words... "We love you!" The Holy Ghost had lead me to do good. To say the words that the Savior would say. It was at that very moment that the spirit ushered in. Tears were shed, hearts were softened, and the healing began. That very second! The joy and love of the Lord wrapped around us... like a warm blanket. I can not dispute the power of the Holy Ghost and His influence to do the right thing at the exact moment we needed to. It changed everything on how we would move forward. The atonement instantly began to work in many lives. Not just us or the Donaldson's, but for extended family and the community. I can't even imagine what things would have been like had I not followed that prompting at that time.

The Holy Ghost is a Revelator. He enlightens our mind and fills our souls with joy. This has been very precious to me. As I have waded through grievous trials and afflictions on my mortal journey, I have sought light and knowledge from the Lord to give me understanding, peace, and comfort. Out of a broken heart, I have asked questions, searched the scriptures for answers, and prayed to know things I did not understand. I trusted that the Lord would hear my pleas. I have exercised faith and yearned much for heaven's help in finding answers. And I have received much! Although personal, I can testify that revelation comes through dreams, visions, and streams of steady light that enlightens the mind. More often than not, one answer leads to another one and more work and effort is required to get the entire picture, or answer. I have been able to put pen to paper and write... and write... and the thoughts just keep coming as rushing water. Before I know it, I have written pages of answers to my questions and my understanding has been made bright and clear as the sun at noon day. Oh... this is such a precious gift to me! I can't even describe what joy this has brought to my soul. I am so thankful for the power of revelation. Revelation has been restored to the earth. I am thankful for revelation that comes through our prophet and eternally grateful for personal revelation. It is through the Holy Ghost that we are able to receive revelation, even daily, if we but ask.

The Holy Ghost is a Sanctifyer. To sanctify means to concecrate, renew, purify. It is sacredness, holiness. It is to be born again spiritually. 

"Now this is the commandment: "Repent, all ye ends of the earth, and come unto me and be baptized in my name, that ye may be sanctified by the reception of the Holy Ghost, that ye may stand spotless before me at the last day." 3 Nephi 27:21

I don't understand sanctification completely, but I do know I want to feel its effect before I meet the Lord. I believe that we witnessed a "sanctification" in mother. As she laid in bed, day after day, in the nursing home, I believe she became pure... as a little child. Her desires were to meet the Lord completely clean and free from all sins. She was holy. Her soul was renewed. One particular day, a few days before her passing, Leslie snapped a picture of her lying in bed. She had a perfectly pure white aurora surrounding her entire body. It looked as if she were in angels's clothes. I knew then that she had made her preparations to leave this earth. Her desires now fulfilled. She became pure before the Lord. She had undergone sanctification. I will never forget that witness borne to me. Mother was my example of what it means to die in the Lord. My love for her is so deep. I can call her blessed... because she truly blessed me with her faith and testimony. It burns deep within my heart.

The Holy Ghost is a friend I can not and must not ever live without. He is everything to me! He teaches me, strengthens me, bears witness of truth to me, comforts me, enlightens my mind, fills my heart and mind with joy and peace, renews my spirit, inspires and leads me to do good, warns me of danger and protects me from evil. And He will sanctify me! I will one day stand before the Lord, as pure and clean as I can be in this life, and thank Him for the precious gift of sending me the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. My dearest and truest friend!